An internet Bully , His name is Matt

I write this on 06/13/2007. His name is Matt . He is from New Hampshire. He will not stop, he will use different names, but don't be fooled. I have tried so hard to not allow him in my group at msn. He continues to apply and disguises himself. An Internet bully is a low life being that hides behind an email address or a nickname and acts in a cowardly way. It has taken me around 6 months to decide to report this in my blog, because if someone googles his email or his MSN Nickname they will find what kind of trouble he is. He wants you to feel sorry for him, but don't be fooled, you will feel sorry about letting him in., He is a coward and has been very mean to a lot of people. Mean people Suck...! He is an embarrassment to the Gay community, an embarrassment to the Crochet and Knit community. He will definitely go to Gre'Thor!


This guy is trouble in any group that you have, he comes from MSN,and it is in MSN that he is causing problems. As far as I know he causes no problems in yahoo.

76.19.53.118 this is his latest IP Address if you show full headers on the email application it will tell you the originating email IP. He tried to report me to msn and then I turned it against him ,because his last email as Matt and as Theo Lost were from the same IP Address. Busted

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Someone said that it was breaking privacy laws, the fact that I published his emails addresses. I do not think so. Why does he wants to join a group with multiple ids? Is he trying to do something? Email addresses are public domain and you can get them easily, specially from hotmail. Everything can be bought in life, but Love. Even you, who visited my page, I know the IP Address from which you enter. Do you think it is Useless? Who knows if that is his real name, but at least is the one he uses most. I am sure the Great State of New Hampshire is big enough to have at least 10,000 Matt, Matthew or whatever ,if that is his real name. The IP is real and I go for that. How do you think that they track Children Predators? In my opinion that pataq'h falls in the same category, a troll and an Internet stalker. By IP ADDRESS!!!!! I don't think so, besides I can assure you that Matt Does not go to the Library, he is a classless lowlife pataq'h. This was the only way I had of really making a difference, as you can attest by the comments, I am not alone. Life will make its karmic imprint on him some day!

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All these are his MSN Nicknames. Well he disguises himself as women and as other people and disrupts your groups. Well if you do not have message approval on your group, turn it on. I think that the approach to this bullying has to be approached from a different perspecitvie. You can not keep them out forever, but when you allowed them in you can monitor their messages forever. Yahoo provides such a tool and MSN does as well, with this tool you can have a member on moderated status forever. This is the solution in my opinion!

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So if you feel like giving this person an opportunity go ahead, but moderate his messages all the time. Is the only way for him to behave. Thanks for all the suggestions to my inbox and all the group managers who have contacted me.

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I managed to keep him out by being diligent and creating a questionaire and a rule for the group. If your applicant does not have an active Blog, they will not be approved. He will not give up. What he can not do is have a blog for each of his personalities.

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_Justin1Ruben1_
AllThe0therz
CKTV4EVR
Crochet4Knitting
MattMarkAnt

Cronky13
MM--AP
Mark13Anthony13

m_m_a_p7 (Yahoo ID)

Winnie1Pooh1 (MSN )

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His email addresses are

crochetknitting4groups@hotmail.com
the0thersrl0st@hotmail.com
Bidalot2win@hotmail.com
Justin2Ruben1@hotmail.com

cronitelly13@msn.com ****New ID as of June 21, 2007

junglegrrrrrl@hotmail.com New as of 08/26/2007

winniepoohbare@hotmail.com New as of Sep 14, 2007

If you have the ability to see the Originating IP address of the email you can do a seacrh here at this site http://whatismyipaddress.com/staticpages/index.php/lookup-ip

Last IP Address 71.232.187.150 as of 08/26/07, 09/14/2007

This is from an email he continues to send to people will he ever stop?

"From: "Matthew Provencher" cronitelly13@msn.com

Subject: GOODBYE!

Date: Sat, 30 Jun 2007 13:00:26 -0400

By midnight tonight, June 30, 2007, I will have deleted all email and contacts from this address, and will stop accessing it. Any mail received here after midnight tonight will be filtered as junk and deleted w/o reaching me, EVER! I've tried several times throughout the month to re-establish contact and a possible friendship with you, but you have not replied to any messages."

WE CAN ONLY HOPE!

Update 08/30/07

I have committed myself of exposing this guy for who he is. He will keep on trying to get into everyone's group, just because he is mean and wants to be an arse. If you let him join to ease him and moderate him, he will try to get in with a diffenrent name, but the same attitude lol! He is so crystal clear in his application, and he has a problem, he can not avoid being Matt, sooner or later he will reveal himself. Remember don't answer his email asking you why is so difficult to get into your group, he will report you as spamming. Ignore him , he can't stand that, but will quit eventually. I just block his emails.

Today this is what he wrote on Sept 14, 2007 after I did an IP search and it was the same Ip as the Junglegrrrrl

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Update 09/14/07

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"What does where I'm from have to do with anything? Do you have a problem with NH or something? Where are you from? Don't you have a busy enough life to not bother looking to find out where every email comes from? Pathetic, and rather invasive IMHO. Thanks for accepting me and banning me immediately. Why don't you get off the internet you sick weirdo? BTW, I looked up your blog when I got your email. You're fuXXXXg ugly dude."

It is you who is UGLY in the SOUL Matt!

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These Links to help you with Newbies:

You need to belong to this group to use this

http://www.msnusers.com/ChatCentralGateway/Documents/Utilities/Profiler.html

Great Resource

http://www.google.com/

This is where you can get information on IP Addresses very accurate, people think they are anonymous , think again, it can pnpoint your address very accurately.

http://whatismyipaddress.com/staticpages/index.php/lookup-ip

Nebulae a wonder in Space 2006

Sometimes when I look at pictures like this one, the Cat's eye Nebula, I get fascinated at the beauty of the Universe. Often I wonder how many worlds out there support life and have the ability to travel through space. Maybe one day we will find out, sooner that we think. that we are not alone at all

I found this picture and wanted to share it with all of you as I continue working on my crochet and kniting projects. Thanks for stopping by.

To Achieve is not to be Arrogant

I want to share with you some of my story. Each of us has a tale to tell, this is part of my life for me to share. After spending two years in college and living at home with my mother. I decided that I wanted to join the military in the Health Services Department. The experience was great. This are my buddies and we depended on each other, Shapiro, Posner, Henshaw, Hooper, Riley, and Mendez I belive was the other hispanic guy. We were a team and we made it through, standing tall and looking good, we ought to be in holliwood. Pictures were not allowed at this time, but we sneaked a camera, I sneaked a camera LOL.

Being arrogant is something that does not work in the military as you are constantly watched and scrutinized. It is your responsability to let your supervisor know that you qualify for a promotion. I did such thin and by the time I was 1.5 years in the military I became s Specialist 5th Class or my equivalent later in the Navy as Petty Officer 2 nd Class. So forgive me for being proud about myself and my accomplishments.

Here below you will find two Medals among the ones that I got at peacetime, I also got the good conduct medal. I had my Overseas Ribbon, Sharp Shooter, Grenade Marksman and qualified with a 45. Medics have to know how to defend their patients and themselves if the need comes.

So excuse me for being such a self accomplished individual who has a great self-esteem.

I enjoyed sharing part of a great past with you. Why did n't I continue, I wanted to go back home and finish my schooling. I graduated from the University in Puerto Rico after coming from the ARMY. My Diploma at the end of this blog entry. I am very proud of myself and my accomplishments. I am not better than anyone on this planet , nor am I worst, I consider myself an equal to everyone. Some of us are smarter in different areas, some of us are craftier, but no one is better than anyone. To hear someone say that I am an arrogant person , because I take care of myself the best I can, and I am proud of the hard earned self-respect and accomplishments, makes me very upset. It shows something though, if they have spent that much time with me and feel that way, they truly do not know who I am. The fact is that I am removing myself from that atmosphere of incongruent thoughts and mindset and I will return to Kobol my home. Thanks for listening and allow me to share my life with you.

WIll you walk with me to and through the StarGate

"This is a part of me many of you don't see, I am expressing part of my life in code only for me to know, yet many of you will see clearly parts of your realities presented"

What do you say is today? Do you know what's happening in my heart, do you know the depths of my soul? Alone but not lonely, today but not right now. The essence of my being keeps shifting and evolving and I have not a way of controlling the outcome, but to watch.

Do you know how the ocean knows or do you know the way the sand learns the knowing. Darkness is no longer in the midst of Caprica, nor are the moons of Bajor in danger of an attack. Yet today is the day of rebirth another one is born. Are you the hipocrite whose shallow life is bent on the marking of judgement, how dare you judge my beauty by how I look, how dare you judge my soul by what I write. You say you don't mean it yet you keep on doing it! Do you take me for a fool, pa'taqh. You miserable tobah, what kind of intellectual diarrhea comes out of your brain?

Can you feel the winds of change under your wings, can you hear the chimes from the oracle of Quintana. You fool you deserve no punishment and no reward, the Gods are not smiling you think you are good at your game, yet the Gods always win.

Yet some of you not many will join me in the path to freedom, will you take my hand and walk through the StarGate with me? I promise things will not be the same, today, tomorrow and yesterday exist in the same moment. Come let's walk through the StarGate, there is no turning back.

May the Gods of Kobol have mercy on our souls. Jump!!!

Joy to the Worlds

Joy to the Worlds, of Budahood that is.

About four years ago I decided to break away from all organized religion. I think that all religions are good as long as you don't personally sacrifice me or any living being in your rituals.

I am not a buddhist, yet I chant, I am not christian yet I see the Christ consciousness, I am not a skeptic, yet I believe in nothingness, I am not a Jew by religion, yet I have a Menorah, I am not a catholic, yet I see the wonders and monstroucities of the church, and not a hindi yet I see the love of life in every being. Pass me the London Broil please!

What I don't see is the needless suffering that some people put themselves through because of the holidays; AND THE NEED TO SPREAD IT AROUND!

Is it about giving? , maybe, Is it about commerce?, maybe, Is it about sharing?, maybe. I think that the most important part of the holidays is what it does mean to you at a personal level. My friend, he is so upset, because his family does not think of him enough, because they give him a gift certificate, because they don't appreciate his gifts. I told him to give me the gifts that are thoughtless and I will spend them or find them a home.

I guess it is because I am puertorrican at heart, we love parties and gifts. Do you know that we celebrate Christmas on the 25th of December, then the Epiphanyon January 6th, twice as many gifts for those fortunate enough. On the Epiphany you get a shoe box and fill it with cut grass, no not that kind of grass, and you put the box under your bed with a bowl of water. It is for the camels, or in puertorrican folklore the horses. In the morning the Kings have left gifts under the bed? Talking about the tooth fairy being a cheapo. LOL. Oh and we don't have a tooth fairy, it is actually a mouse o ratoncito that leaves the money under the pillow. The festivities do not stop there. You will know that there are 8 days following the Kings visitation to the holy child, that people still have parties and drinking, we love the dringking part too, it's called "Las Octavitas" .

When I give a gift, I honestly don't expect a thank you card, not that it is proper you know. In reality giving is about you expressing something. I don't give what I don't want to give, and if I receive something I don't want, I am sure someone else can benefit from what I got. I will never make a sacrifice to buy a gift. So my friend year after year goes in pain, because of this. Finally this year , actually yesterday I told him. I asked? "What do you care about Christmas? Aren't you a Budhist? Well he got upset and told me I was being mean. I said why will a non christian care wether there is even a christmas holiday. My God if at your age you still in that space, then make yourself miserable on your own time or JUST GROW UP!!!!

It's no secret that I do not tolerate self-pity and self-worthlessness issues for too long. I give a gift because I want to give, because it is in my heart to give, sometimes you feel you need to give, but always give with a happy heart. It is nice to receive as well, but I need so little, that a card is enough, a thank you is enough and if I don't get that, maybe, just maybe I will rethink my gift giving to you the next time. LOL.

I was not going to write today, but the many voices in my head were in consortium and allowed me to come up with something to write today. Actually I can not allow it to go without sharing in this season of sharing, it was too important. Just make sure that if you get a gift certificate that your uncaring family sent you and you don't want it, e-mail me and I will give you my mailing address so that you can send it to me. I will make sure those uncaring people get their monies' worth, and I will be thinking of you while I spend it. NEVER GIVE BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO, BUT BECAUSE YOU WANT TO! I just don't get it and in the meantime why do you want to make everyone share your misery? I guess it goes like if I am not happy nobody should be? Give me a break dude! I have empathy for him, don't get me wrong, but after offering unsolicited advice for 4 holiday seasons, I get tired of him suffering and not following my advice, that was given freely and without asking, but I had too, my mental health depended on it. Don't let anyone steal the wing beneath your wings.

Joy to the World , we are open for business! Peldor Joi!

Puertorrican Plus!!!

I have a confession to make, I am a puertorrican since birth. It is not a well known fact that puertorricans have been american citizens for about 100 years, the Jones-Shafroth Act gave the citizenship to puertorricans a long time ago. It is not a secret, but I am more than a puertorrican. In the year 1988 I became HIV +. Having the HIV Virus has been no picnic and, needless to say some people think I deserve it; while others pity me. Some show compassion, some people make the distinction between being HIV as opposed to having AIDS and being puertorrican. I like that, I want to be treated like an individual that has many layers. Being HIV positive is like being human, until now, there is nothing that I can do to change who I am, so I will have to live with who I am and do the best I can everyday for which I have a breath of air. Today I have AIDS.

Puertorrican Plus!!! Blogging my life away, i am getting out some of my secrets in hopes that someone will benefit from what I write. I was sexually abused by my father from the early age of 5 years of age. I remember the first time it happened like it was yesterday. Going forward in life at the age of about 8 my half brother started the same game of abuse; he is 5 years older than me. Did I tell anyone? You bet, I told my mother and she spanked me for fibbing, how dare I say that kind of thing about my brother. Well ladies and gents, my father sexually abused me until the age of 14. My brother sexually abused me until a week before he got married. I thanked the God I believed in. Now I had room to breathe for once in my life. From this moment on, it will be up to my mother to emotionally try to scar me for the rest of my life with fear of God and whatever she could find available. (Yes. I know she was doing the best she knew; that does not mean I had to like it.) Hopefully for me I created a thick skin, independant thinking and, by the age of 37 -- yes 37 years of age -- I realized that I have been operating from the modus operandi of a sexually-abused person. I secretly trusted no one ever since.

A child survivor of sexual abuse has a very difficult life, for it colors everything you do and everything you say until you start to mend the broken boy and become a mending man. Unfortunately, the job is never done; it is a continious work in progress. The book that helped me turn my life around was "Broken Boys Mending Men" by Stephen D. Grubman-Black. At the age of 37, I realized I was still the victim of that sexual abuse from so long ago. I was confused, lost and not knowing who I was, what was mine, or what was the result the abuse actually had on my life.

Why me? It became a constant question. Being an incest/sexual abuse survivor really SUCKS!!! Why did I feel this way? How can I fix this? Who can I trust? I realized I had to take care of my own problems. No one could help me that I trusted but me. Yet, why did it take so long in fixing myself? The only thing I had left was to help myself heal, to pull myself up, like many times before, and look at what was really mine, my accomplishements, my creativity, my loving nature. I stopped the cycle before it went further. No more abuse, the buck stops here. I am free.

I am proud of that. I am sharing this in hopes that someone can benefit from it and in hopes that any child molester will see how the truth eventually will come out. If I allow my anger to take over, I will publish the punishment that I think is fit for this kind of crime, but needless to say, anger does not possess that kind of hold in me any longer. Children are innocent and should be protected from child molesters no matter what gender, sexual orientation or habit they wear. Child molesters come from every walk of life, whether being a heterosexual, homosexual, male, female, priest, president, neighbor. I guess you get the idea.

Life was very different from that day on. I live life without regrets 100%; I have no fear of death. I believe in the law of physics: "For every Action there is a Reaction"

In classical physics, a reaction is defined by Newton's third law that can be formulated like

• Whenever one body exerts force upon a second body, the second body exerts an equal and opposite force upon the first body or also
• For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. One must never forget that these two forces are exerted on different bodies.

The idea that any given force has a pair or opposite force.

That is how this puertorrican plus has learned to view the Universe. When I was younger I had the arrogant concept of an Earth Centered "God" and, by that, I mean that, in our arrogance as humans, we believe that "God" has no other planet to worry about, his constant attention is devoted to Earth, the Blue Marble. I do not limit "God" to that frame, my "God" is incomprehensible by human standards, but it is there. It you say yes, as far as I know, there is no gender in heaven; the importance of gender is an evolutionary necessity for procreation . Anyway it is my personal belief.

Nature always brings peace to me. In nature, I find the hand of the unknown, the Universal Intelligence at work. Here is a picture of me many moons ago near my home town enjoying the
"El Yunque Rainforest"


My father's ancestors came to Puerto Rico in the early 1500's to colonize the island and convert the natives into Christians. What a concept, but I will leave it at that. My mother's family can be traced to when Rodrigo de Nevares set foot on the shores of Arecibo sometime between 1700 and 1708, coming from Spain. I really enjoy this ancestry search, it can get very complicated if you allow it to overwhelm you.

San Juan the capital city of Puerto Rico is almost 500 years old, you can see in this picture taken from one of it's fortresses, the Old San Juan .

I grew up being proud of the city I was from. Lots of culture, art, and history, the main Cathedral in the middle of the island city.

Well this puertorrican plus is about to finish his post for today. It is important to say nobody can take away my innocence anymore, or rob me from being a loving human being. The God I believe in is bigger than any human word, book, or philosophy can describe . My God is the ruler of the whole Universe, not just a selected group of people, like the Sun my God shines on good and not so good people. From California I say to you Namaste.

Fearless Lion

Here is the Lion Baby Bath Wrap with my Benjamin. He is my boy doll. Oh. By the way, he in fact is anatomically correct! He is an amazing boy and loves to model with daddy.

Talking about fearless lions. My friend, Coco, a Japanese lady friend of mine, shared with me one day the fact that she was terrified about spiders; and that even though she was terrified about spiders, she still wanted to help her little girl grow up without that fear. She taught her little girl not to be afraid of spiders and allow her little girl to develop her own fears, and not the fears inherited from her as a parent.

Sometimes, when we feel afraid, have you thought about it? Are these fears our own or the ones we learned from others? Fear is there to be conquered and serves a purpose; once that purpose is served, then fear has no place. In my life experience I have learned to trust life and the Universal Intelligence some call God. When it comes to this lion there is no fear , just cuteness.